Tag: happiness

This too shall pass

There are times where the rain seems all you can see …

‘This too shall pass’ is a phrase that has can be traced back to Sufi poets and has appeared in many cultures in one shape or another throughout history. Perhaps the most famous, and attributable, use of it was by Abraham Lincoln, who, as well as being famous for being the first president of the United States after the Civil War, was apparently also someone who had experienced crippling depression earlier in his life. It rang a chord.

My mother is in her 90s and is currently experiencing debilitating confusion and decline in mental capacity – we do not yet have her condition diagnosed because of complications with the process, and my brother and I are trying to get a support package for her put into place, but it takes time. She is miserable and feels life has gone on too long and she has lost herself.

I find myself thinking about what to do and how to help most of the day, when not distracted by other more immediate requirements, and am finding it difficult to turn this off and go to sleep at night. I live a minimum two-hour drive away, but my brother is close at hand and is therefore bearing the brunt practically. I am concerned about him even though he seems to be managing very well.

I feel guilty when I am not there, and exhausted when I go to stay with her for a few days, and when I am home, I am spending a lot of time on the phone with her or my brother – or trying to participate in various meetings about her condition over my brother’s phone… a system he kindly puts in place whenever he can.

Yet at this precise moment here I am worrying, searching for solutions, explanations and support pathways on my computer, when in fact I am sitting at my desk on a sunny Sunday afternoon and realistically nothing is required of me at this moment in time.

I need to let go and live in the moment … I know this in my head, but I am not yet living it. I need to live it.

In a moment of sanity earlier today Lincoln’s saying ‘this too shall pass’ came to mind. It struck me that although I have no idea when this will have passed, or indeed how it will pass, I can be sure it will pass one way or the other.

I allowed myself a brief glimpse into how it will feel when this worry is over, and it was good.

No doubt during the path there I will experience other feelings, but they too will pass if I let them. Pondering on it here, as I write, I realise that despite not knowing when or how that future will come to pass, I can use my imagination to experience some of the peace of it here, now.

Maybe ‘not knowing’ is part of what makes it possible to do this … I don’t know … but I do know that now, in this moment, it makes me smile inside and smiling is good.

With a smile inside I know it is possible for me to handle the next few moments, hours, days, weeks, months, years even, with more peace, more kindness and more love. 

Thanks Abraham.

Share D’All
July 2024

Encroaching darkness

Looking at the future sometimes it feels like there is nothing but dark clouds …

Living in the times that we do, it’s easy to become overwhelmed by the immense challenges, conflict, and downright craziness that we seem to be experiencing across the world. It’s easy to want to turn it all off, batten down the hatches and just try to pretend it isn’t happening.

This is not to mention of course that on top of these worldwide problems, or maybe because of them, there are many people struggling with much more immediate and personal challenges, which could, by themselves, reduce us to a feeling of just needing to trudge on day to day, doing our best to just get through.

Sometimes wherever you look it feels like there is an encroaching darkness that we seem powerless to confront, and it can inspire in us a primeval fear that can eat away at hope and optimism.

Yet, as I was reflecting on this the other day it struck me that darkness is an opportunity for light to shine. I once again was reminded that without darkness we would not even notice light existed so, looked at through the right lens, darkness is an opportunity.

We live in a world full of opportunity, and wow, do we need the light to shine.

I think in this situation, as in most others if truth be told, light is synonymous with love, which in itself is synonymous with wisdom and courage.

I am sure, in fact every now and then you hear and see it (even amidst the devastation in Gaza), there are those in every situation who have light and are shining it. In fact I think that in reality most of us have light, but as is often the case, because we may feel we only hold a little of it we don’t realise its power.

We’ve become intimidated by the fact that those we see as having power are those who are seeding darkness – yet in fact they are few compared to us, it’s just that we have allowed them to become raised up.

I am sure there are those who have light in Hamas, I am sure there are those who have light in Russia, I am sure there are those who have light in the leadership of Israe. I am sure in every country across the world there are those who have light; sufficient even so that if we start to admire the light, rather than fear the darkness, there are enough to help us reduce and manage the potentially terrible impacts of climate change on our world.

There are many who are lost in the fear and darkness and who, at the moment, can only see and feel anger, loss and hatred – they need light and love as much, if not more than anyone. So shine on, wherever you are.

There are many of us too who have enough wisdom to know we need to hang on, but too often rather than letting the light guide our way, we are grasping at the straws of our current and previous existences. We need to take the courage to let go and follow the light to the raft or boat that is within reaching distance, if we would just recognise it for what it is.  Life changes and we need to too.

This is not a call for revolution, or even radical change, it is me shining a light on the opportunity that exists. Look for the light rather than the darkness, then shine with it and eventually the darkness will become merely a shadow behind us.